Hostfamily letter < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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| Aufgabe | Hallo ihr,
ich werde dieses Jahr im Sommer nach Amerika fliegen und dann dort für 11 Monate bei einer Gastfamilie wohnen. Um die Gastfamilie ermitteln und überzeugen zu können soll ich von meiner Organisation aus einen ersten Hostfamily letter schreiben.. Den hab ich jetzt geschrieben und würd gern wissen was ihr davon haltet oder eventuell sogar Verbesserungsvorschläge habt!! Lg Kahti |
Dear host family,
Foremost I want to express my thanks to you that you will give me the chance to become an exchange student and to take part in your daily life. I am glad about you will make it possible for me, to improve my written and spoken English, to get to know to alien things, to make new friends and, of course, to make unpayable and unforgettable experiences in America. My family and I went to the USA for several times, when I was a child. Since this, the longing to your land and the dream to live there grow up tireless. Now the dream changes into reality: I will spend 10 months in the country of the boundless possibilities.
But I will start at the beginning. My name is Kathrin XYZ, but almost everybody names me Kathi. I am a 16-year-old girl and, of course, I live together with my family in Leipheim. Leipheim is a small town with about seven thousand inhabitants and it is in Bavaria. I am a student of the 10th grade at Maria-Ward-Gymnasium in Guenzburg, which is a neighbouring city to Leipheim. My favourite subjects are English, math and physics. My parents both work all day, so I have to work independent. I must have the willingness to compromise. I have to respect others and I plan and organize things by myself. But this doesnt disturb me. I really enjoy doing that!
I think my Mum is the most important person in my life. Most of the time we come along very well, but if we have a dispute, it always doesnt last long, because both of us dont endure. The relationship to my Dad is also very good. On weekdays he cant spend much time with us, because of his job and his additional work in a voluntary organization and in politics. But that doesnt matter. Most of the time I think I have the best parents you could ever have, and on the other moments you like to shoot them to the moon! But in my opinion that is the same in every family! The relationship to my grandparents from the side of my Mum is lacking, the connection to my grandparents of Dads side is very limited because of the distance we both live in. So we see our grandparents only about five times a year.
In my free time I spend most of the time with my family, my friends or I do my hobbies. Swimming in DLRG (DLRG is a voluntary organization in Germany which protects people in every relation with water, e. g. save people from drowning, flood, high tide, ..), diving, working with the fire department, occupying with the Computer, cooking, dancing, reading and jogging are belonging to them for example. I regularly swim once till three times a week with the DLRG, and also once a week I go diving in our hometown indoor swimming-pool. It would be very fine, if I could continue some of my hobbies when I am with you. But if this isnt the case, it doesnt matter. My friends must be like me: polite, clever, sporty, fair and nice to other people. She dislikes people, who judge other people for their appearance, who arent helpful and polite to other people. Anyhow I want to learn something new, and that is one of the reasons for a stay abroad. Here in Germany religion doesnt play a big role in our family, even if I visit a catholic high school only for girls. Maybe this attitude changes when I am with you, or what do you think about religion?!
On weekdays we get up at quarter past six. Till I leave for the school bus at seven oclock we have our breakfast together. When my brother and I come home after school at one oclock, we cook lunch. I commiserate about my parents cant participate because they are both on work. Till they come home at about half past five, my brother and I do the housework together- as far as we can. If my father has free time without spending time on discussions with the city council, we have dinner together. There we talk about the things which happened during the day, about school and work. On weekends we do the shopping, care our garden, spend time at indoor swing-pools or play games together. But it is no matter what activity we do the most important thing is that we do something together.
I wish I get a nice, and loving new family with you. I hope you will support and help me with everything you can, but I dont want that you will spoil me like a guest, I only want to be a full family member. Not only in view of the rights I have, but also with the requirements I have at your home. If it is possible, I want to help as much as at home in the household. Maybe you put yourself in my position to understand me. I know that an exchange student must have the willingness to perform, if he wants to succeed in this time. You get a highly motivated and efficient student with me. I have the ambition and the perseverance to go along even with high requests. I work independent and I have the willingness to compromise, I enjoy planning and organizing things and I respect others. Hopefully these are reasons for your family to welcome me for ten months.
After this exchange year I hope that I have a good command of speak and an even more independent life than now. If I do my Abitur (you can compare the Abitur with your high school diploma) successfully, I want to study medicine. After my studium I would like to go to the Third World to help the ill and the poor. There I will need English as the official language. So it would be very helpful for me, to take part in such a program. I think the job as ambassador for Germany, no matter in the USA or in the Third World, is a demanding an interesting activity. In my opinion I am able to do this job, because I did similar things in the last few years. in school for example. I was the class representative and in my free time I stand in for the youth group of our fire department in conferences and sessions.
I hope I didnt bore you with all the information- hopefully all you wanted to get. Now I put trust in your family that you can achieve my dream spending one year abroad. I will do my best to make this year nice for both of us and I think that we can learn many things of each other.
Of course I will take great efforts to spend a successful year at an American high school. I am really looking forward to meet you and I am very exited to live in your country as a member of your family.
I am glad about getting a letter with your address. Also nice greetings from the rest of my family.
Love,
Kathi
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(Antwort) fertig  | | Datum: | 21:25 Mo 18.02.2008 | | Autor: | moody |
Im großen und ganzen eigentlich eine gute Leistung, hier und da vielleicht ein paar Ungereimtheiten aber nichts wildes.
Was ich aber anmerken möchte:
1) Der Begriff Land der unbegrenzten Möglichkeiten exisitiert in den USA nicht, das solltest du umforlieren.
2) alien things, dafür solltest du auch eine bessere Formulierung finden.
3) Wiederholst du dich teilweise sogar fast im Wortlaut.
4) Eventuell solltest du mehr darüber schreiben was dir dieser Aufenthalt bedeutet, wie sehr du dich freust etc., statt davon zu schwärmen wie toll deine familie ist.
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Hallo Mausibaerle ![[winken]](/images/smileys/winken.gif "[winken]") ,
Ich kann mich Moody nur anschließen, deine Wiederholungen solltest du überarbeiten. Besonders im Kontext deiner Familie.
Es ist schön, dass du so viel tolles über deine Family schreibst, aber streiche alles wiederholte, damit deine Gastfamilie nicht falsche Gedanken bekommen könnte.
Ansonsten fand ich die sprachliche Gestaltung wirklich sehr gut.
Liebe Grüße,
Sarah 
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![[applaus]](/images/smileys/applaus.gif "[applaus]"){kind=small}
![[cap]](/images/smileys/cap.gif "[cap]"){kind=small}
Gruß
